Your marriage can encounter serious problems until it is fallen apart. However, you may feel you wish it could be saved. Do not worry. When a marriage is broken, it does not mean that it is impossible to be saved. Here are some hints to save a broken marriage.
1. Remember your motivations to be in love
Getting married to someone is not by accident. Even if you meet someone and fall in love with them at the first sight, it takes time until you reach marriage.
There are good times, and good memories that you create throughout your journey of love. If you want to save your marriage, you must visit your past and identify all the good reasons that pushed you to fall in love with your partner.
Write down every good thing you can remember that made you fall in love with that person among many others.
2. Active listening
Listening to your partner again and discovering their needs may help rebuild your relationship. Throughout the conversations, your partner expresses their worries and doubts about your relationship. Thus. You discover some points that strongly need reparation.
3. Identify the reasons that destroyed your marriage
Identification of the problems that caused your marriage to fail is an important step to fixing it even after it is broken. Try to remember how the situation started worsening and the reasons why. Be fair. Do not throw all the responsibilities to your partner or feel strongly guilty yourself. Be objective. Do not blame any of you. Just reconstruct the story without judgement.
4. Create discussion opportunities
You must try to talk to your partner as you can if you find that they are in a suitable mood to listen. Do not wait for them to start reconnecting with you. You are the first response to do so. Try to create opportunities to discuss with your partner. However, your discussions should not be time to provide personal justifications. You just discuss the situation in which your marriage is and its possible consequences.
5. Date again
You may have children to care for, a job that consume your time, and any other things that may require your full attention. However, do not let such other things make you busy enough to lose time to date again your partner. No matter what keeps you busy, you should never be distracted and avail yourself of date times as when you first met.
6. Find reasons to reconnect
Whatever good reasons that may push your partner to attend a meeting, even for a few minutes must be exploited. If the meeting is impossible, you should find reasons to chat with your partner about positive issues. Spending a few minutes per day at least reconnects your minds.
7. Observe your past commitments
During your marriage, you may have made some commitments toward your partner. You may have stopped a while during your trouble moments. You know that things went wrong the time you started missing out on some of your commitments. It’s time to wake up and observe your obligations towards your partner. That may save your broken marriage.
8. Heal yourself first
Do you recognize your responsibilities in all troubles that hit your marriage? You may have been a burden to your partner at some points. You neither are perfect nor devil, your partner neither. Just reflect on your past failures and work on them. Set corrective measures and strictly observe them so that your partner sees that you really have changed for good and forever.
9. Focus on the qualities of your partner
It may be true that the weaknesses of your partner are the cause of your marriage falling apart. It may be because of infidelity, abuses, mismanagement, or irresponsibility of your partner that you were unable to tolerate. However, you must remember that you did not marry an angel but a human being with qualities and defaults. Thus, your focus should be put on positive traits, and on strengths to save your broken marriage. Your starting side to analysing your partner should be the positive one. Appreciate the things your partner can do better. Take the negative side as an assignment to work on. Keep in mind that your partner will continue making mistakes. Be patient. Do not get tired of corrections. Change takes time.
10. Respect your partner
No matter what has broken your marriage, never disrespect your partner. Whatever behaviour your partner may show, react as a mature person, and manage your emotions wisely. You may be strongly hurt. You may be disappointed enough. Respect is the most important weapon that can help you win any war and battle in the relationship. Keep in mind that your partner is the most valuable person in your life and in the community.