Today's relationship seems to be volatile and dynamic different from what the matter used to be before 50 years. The introduction of the digital age has complicated the matter in which the majority of relationships remain undefinable. In response, the lexicons of terms to simplify the expansive love terms are also increasingly becoming more communicative than ever before.
Now, it is important to note that the normal relationships where people used to date, engage and get married are no longer the norm; instead, every dating stereotype whose presence was not described before is now clearly illustrated, which is mostly attributed to the exacerbation of the dating apps coming into existence.
With the advent of dating stereotypes, relationship experts have also tried not to sit idly until they explicate the complications of emerging dating terminologies as the new relationship terms have taken centre stage.
Now than before, every stage of a relationship is categorically explained, whether the relationship is reciprocated by the crush or the person you are seeing is crushing on another person, or the engaged person is interested outside the engagement zone are all explained.
Nonetheless, there are many dating scenarios that go hand-in-hand with emerging terminologies on the dating scene, such as ghosting, breadcrumbing, and gaslighting, among many others.
In fact, "paper clippers" or "paper clipping" are among those new dating terms on the scene that you need to understand.
Illustrator Samantha Rothenberg first came with an Instagram post and captioned the image, which attracted almost 14,000 likes.
The word paper clipping or paper clippers was inspired by the artwork of Samantha Rothenberg, whose Instagram post under the name Violet Clair.
She described the text messages of a guy who used to send creepy pop-up messages out of nowhere after separating as paper clippings.
"Sometimes, I pop up for no reason at all. See, the truth is, I'm damaged, flaky, and not particularly interested in you. But I don't want you to forget I exist," Samantha's illustrated Instagram post explained.
On an Instagram post-Rothenberg first came up with the word "paperclipping", which later attracted attention from the New York Post, Glamour and NBC, among other publications.
Dating experts have defined "paper clipping" as a dating situation where someone comes back into the life of a person they abandoned with the purpose of making them feel about themselves and then leaves again.
It is a weird dating situation in which a psycho person feels good, re-energized, and confident by emotionally using other persons in their interest. The "Clippy" person makes you think that they are interested in you without indicating any signs of a committed relationship.
"Paperclipping is when someone has you on the back burner, and it feels like you are about to go cold. They will reach you not in an attempt to move things forward but to re-stoke the flame and make sure you are still an option," Rothenberg said in an interview with Refinery 29.
"It's quite typical, and there's something empowering about giving the action a name."
According to the Collins Dictionary, "paper clipping" is when a person you dated abruptly sends you a message after a long absence, then vanishes once more.
According to Carla Maine Manly, a clinical psychologist, "paperclipping" is a new term for old-age behaviour in which a person with flaky behaviour exploits others in exchange for their self-worth by feeding on apparent connection and emotional reactions of others.
With the Manly description, definitely, paper clippers are emotional predators who will exploit any chances available to any person who weakly exposes them to their quarters. In most cases, paper clippers will leave out of the place before things get tangible and then reappear unexpectedly to invalidate their self-worth.
It's likely that you may be "paperclipped" without knowing. Yet, by paying attention to these trivial signs, there are sure ways that you will realize whether you are "paperclipped" or not.
They give you false hopes
The paper clippers will do all that they can to make sure that you feel the vibrancy and hope in your life, and then they will leave you again and give out excuses for their past behaviours. The clippers or paper clippers will continually ghost you and do whatever they can to cancel the plans despite the willingness to show the commitments.
Cold conversations
The sure signs of the paper clippers are that their conversation with them is going to bore and get cold because they have no legitimate purpose of moving things in the mutually benefiting mode between you and them.
All they have to do is to initiate conversations that seek to know what you feel about them but couldn't have a meaningful conversation with you. Talking to them is going to put you into deep confusion, leaving the person hanging in a dilemma on what to do next about themselves.
Random appearance
Usually, when people take long without talking to each other for quite some time, the chances are that they are going to be surprised when they get messaged or called on when someone who abandoned them appears in such a manner. Paperclippers will shock you with comebacks and nagging conversations that will make you feel hopeful. You will rather find out that their actions weren't really genuine.
What to do if you are "paperclipped."
The best way to deal with "paper clippers" is to avoid them when they reappear. Just know they are always the same, and the problem is not on you but their flaky behaviour and repulsive attitude attached to their personality. Don't let their indistinct conversations confuse you; instead, tell them straight away what they want to communicate.
It is advisable to abandon the undefined unhealthy messages which do not sound communicatively straightforward from Clippy persons.
Noteworthy
If you are "paperclipped", it is important to keep in your mind that it's never your part to be blamed, but instead, the blame should be shifted to them. It doesn't either mean that you have done wrong or there is something unattractive about you. Keep in mind that there is nothing wrong with keeping Clippy persons outside your friend zone; it makes you well. You should also understand that you will find other people who treat you well and respect you deservingly.